i was nearly in a car accident yesterday with Carol Channing. i'm not certain if she was the Carol Channing or a man dressed as Carol, but the resemblance was striking. unfortunately, she really pissed me off by a) being in the wrong lane of a two lane street where she was trying to make a left turn through rush hour traffic. b) trying to gun her way through traffic and across the street, nearly hitting me, then giving me the finger like i was doing something more than waiting for her to get the hell out of the way. true to form, i made an audible list of every profane word i could think of, pointing at her, shouting, "I'm gonna kick your ass, Channing!".

so, Carol, next time you're on Hollywood Squares, you better watch out. i'll be there in the studio audience, waiting. Martin Mull and Whoopi won't be able to save you.