just got back from the stupid company costume contest. none of the contestants knows what "Most Original or Creative" means. almost everyone who got up there had a store bought costume (Winnie the Pooh is original?). there were a few good ideas that were poorly executed, and then a couple of good, original and creative ideas. the winner of that catagory was a guy from the mailroom wearing what i thought at first to be a Christmas gift. he was "God's Gift to Women."

the partiotic catagory sucked. 4 contestants: Raggedy Ann holding an American Flag, a woman in army fatigues and face paint, a mediocre looking Statue of Liberty, and "Aunt Samantha" (female Uncle Sam, i.e., red, white & blue striped and starred clothing and hat) who played the national anthem on the violin. the judges picked Aunt Sam to win, as long as she played the national anthem again, so she did. people stood up and acted like they actually gave a f*ck. she sounded like a junior high school orchestra student, but everyone cheered for her like she was Yitzhak f*cking Perlman.

my idea for a costume: wear a very boring looking jacket and tie, and keep an inflatable woman in my cubicle, along with a plastic baby doll and a plush stuffed dog. every once in a while, reach over and punch the inflatowoman and scream "Where's my dinner, woman!" what am i? heterosexual.

feh. these people have ruined Halloween for me. no one remembers the true meaning of Halloween.