i think i just found a new addition to my daily read:

The Daily Guerrilla Journal (from November 1999)

• Recovering alcoholic and former cocaine addict George W. Bush is complaining bitterly about the "ambush questions" he was asked last week by a television news reporter concerning the names of four foreign heads of state. Bush knew only one (Taiwan's Lee Teng-hui), and looked like a deer in the headlights as he demonstrated his lack of knowledge about world events. But later, when asked how many grams are in an ounce, Bush perked up, immediately answering "twenty-eight."

that cracked me up.